Have you felt it yet? The emptiness that leaves you wanting – the void that leaves you craving more?
Sometimes it works in reverse … a void that leaves you wanting emptiness instead of fullness. A desire for less instead of more.
There’s even a television show based on the premise of this phenomenon … a term for it. Insatiable. A desire (or appetite) that cannot be fulfilled or satisfied.
Insatiable:
We aren’t talking about the show today – although it’s tempting. It’s definitely a show that draws you in. Instead, the phenomenon itself is on the (conversational) table.
While writing in my journal today, I realized that I am insatiable.
The cycles ebb and flow – we will get to that momentarily – but I am a bottomless pit. An empty void that can never be satisfied. Whether it be food, or material things, or attention … the list goes on. My belly could be stuffed to bursting, but still I want. Surrounded by things and given so much attention I need space, I still crave.
Emptiness:
Yet, as said prior, the cycles ebb and flow.
I crave the emptiness. The sensation of being physically empty. The desire to drown out everything and be pure. Even to eliminate all of the excess and minimize myself. My life.
Although opposite ends of the spectrum, they are both equally true. Equally me.
Is this something you struggle with, too?
Filling the Empty While Emptying the Full:
If you have read this far, then you probably are right there with me. Insatiable. Or perhaps you are in the ebb – instead of devouring everything, you are emptying yourself.
Regardless, we need a solution.
For the Full:
- Identify the (current) desire – food? Attention? Sugar-free gum or (literally) phoning a friend are great options. Try to satisfy without (completely) caving in.
- Figure out what underlying need is being met by this desire or craving. Do you have a need for power? For belonging? Keep in mind that any want or desire can meet multiple needs from the five basic needs. (Learn about the five basic needs in the book, Choice Theory by Dr. William Glasser.)
- Delay gratification. Wait until you are able to be certain that it’s a legitimately helpful desire instead of simply a compulsion or impulse.
For the Empty:
- Mindfulness. Redirect from the desire for less to focus on the experience.
- Identify the underlying need. Do you have a need for power? A need for freedom? If you need freedom, try a short walk. For power, consider playing a game you are good at.
- Reduce noise, or anything else involving the five senses. Sensory overload can overwhelm you and cause a need for reduced “clutter” in your brain.
Tying it All Together:
Although insatiability is usually defined as a desire for more, sometimes there is a very similar sensation that works in completely the opposite way – a desire for less.
This may be exhibited as intentionally starving yourself, purging yourself (or even your possessions), blasting music so loudly that you cannot understand it nor hear yourself think, or a myriad of other ways.
Regardless of how insatiability is found, you are not alone.
If you suffer with the bottomless void of wanting, or with the desire to be empty, have you found a (healthier) option to soothe those needs? What has worked for you? Let me know in the comments below.
Christian, wife, “hybrid” mama, I run the site All Behind A Smile to help others like me.
Leave a Reply